Waking up with Aleks.
Morning routines set a tone for the day ahead. What do you like to do first thing?
Depending on whether you snooze 14 times, jump up ready for the day, or meditate, the idea is that you set a tone for yourself.
Are you happy with how you’re waking up? What would you like your morning routine to look like instead? How possible is it for you to do?
When I wake up, I hit snooze once - I do this partly because I’m lazy and partly because it allows me 10 minutes to feel everything around me. I notice the warmth of the blankets, and their weight over me. I notice whether it’s dark, or if the sky outside has started to glow a soft pink.
Just as I begin to settle into these surroundings that make it so enticing to stay, my alarm goes off again to remind me this is a fleeting moment in time and there will be more moments throughout the day so I’d better move it.
I try to notice my surroundings first thing in the morning so that I set a tone of mindfulness for the day. It will be the moments when the sun hits my skin, the smell of coffee, a song plays; that I will appreciate and be more aware of.
Some mornings I meditate. Meditation isn’t as shit as it sounds / is when you first start. At first, I’d find any excuse to not just sit with myself and thought that meditating was a waste of time. Now I sit and focus and breathe.
And with every breath I learn more about the headspace I’ve woken into. Am I moody bitch today? Yearning for something? Someone? Or am I content and curious?
This time is valuable in offering me insight into what I can manage today. So, if I’m frustrated and get stuck in traffic and want to boil over, I have prior understanding that this headspace wasn’t caused by traffic, it was already there. Instead of boiling, I use this awareness to practice self-compassion. So I belt out an Adele song, day dream and allow it all to ground me.
By Aleks Trkulja.
Who is Aleks Trkulja?
I’m a sex therapist & writer based in Sydney. I work with individuals and couples doing relationship counselling and also facilitate group therapy in eating disorders and addiction.
The essence of who I am comes from what I believe. In a therapeutic setting, who I am is what the client and the issue we’re working with needs me to be.
I particularly love working with women; the amazing and delicate creatures that arrive in therapy believing they must live limited lives. Together we explore their limitless power and potential.
And so who I am becomes a person to challenge those beliefs, and support these people. I like talking about women’s issues, and creating space for female voices.
What is your morning routine?
I snooze once to wake up to my world and notice how it feels that day. Mostly I’m warm and the sky is a soft pink. I meditate to check in with my mind. I like to play around with what I’d wear that day to suit the mood.
Favourite piece of jewellery?
A gold ring my grandma gave me when I was 12. We shopped out west and she haggled with the Jeweller. Then we ate pita at her friends Serbian cafe while they squeezed my cheeks and admired my new ring.
How do you build a vision?
My visions are often really big. So big that sometimes I get scared by them.
When I was writing my thesis I had this professor who was a nun and she said to me; ‘Aleks I can see all your ideas floating above your head. Honestly it’s chaos. So just pick one idea and let’s start there.’
And that’s how I usually start to build a vision; I start small and I build up and out from there.
I talk to friends, mentors, colleagues, clients, strangers and the occasional nun. I talk and share and grow by bouncing visions off those around me.
My mood board is a collage of the conversations I have and the people I meet. They’re the ones that inspire me, or mould me in the direction I need to go.
They say it takes a village to raise a baby, and that’s the exact mentality I use to build a vision.
To check out Aleks' work and or get in touch, visit: